Parenting and Play

Last Friday afternoon, I was out with my camera and drifted into a rather quiet, verdant area that invited passers by to muse over what flowers were intoxicating with the particular scents of spring that were emanating.  I had popped my macro lense on for a few close ups to file away and to muse quietly in the state of mind that a well-crafted and maintained garden can inspire with and get into that zone with the camera.

I was not in complete isolation there. I was a few minutes walk from English Bay in Vancouver and there was the pop and twang of tennis nearby to draw my eye in that direction. Cars were circulating in range of the tennis court and, a little closer to me, a mother was with her friend and her child. From where I stood, I could tell from the toddling stride toward the road that the child was around 15 months old. From the bucket hat and overalls I assumed it was a boy. As he tested his stride and the limits of his independence, his mother got up from where she was and managed to get him to play peek-a-boo.  If I were in that situation, I would have bounded toward the boy in headlong pursuit, panic and over-protectiveness getting the best of me. Peek-a-boo would have been well done the list of interventions to keep the boy out of traffic, no matter how light it was.

I too was rapt in this moment of play and watched as mom escalated her hiding in the game and the boy, giggling, started coming back towards his mother. I am still blown away. From the moment I saw that, I tried to think of ways that I could use play instead of panic to get Gabriel to "get" what I'd prefer him to be doing.  The first thoughts are that it is too late for some of those things where he is too headstrong or rambunctious to settle down and get my point. My attempt at role-playing him through the situation where he bit a classmate at daycare was one possibility and while it was a calm and rational moment for me when trying to discipline or teach him, it is one of those things that I'll have to file away and try to use with him later.

I'm sure there is always a type of play that will help you make a point to your child when teaching certain things and the key is to keep calm and figure out what types of play work best when trying to teach your child the things that you want them to know. When it happens, though, it is magical.